


How could I forget?

by szczepter



Series: KagaKuro week 2016 [3]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Amnesia, M/M, other people mentioned - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-23 23:39:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8347297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/szczepter/pseuds/szczepter
Summary: Kuroko loses his memories of Kagami and Seirin.





	

**Author's Note:**

> for KagaKagakuro week 2016 day4: leave it to me // dependence | hope

There was a couple of things Kagami really could label as 'the worst.'

Getting sucker punched by a basketball because it came out of nowhere (in those rare occasions he _didn't_ saw it of course). Tatsuya being angry at him (that one could be put in the past). Dogs. Many, _many_ dogs. At once. The generation of miracles acting like they owned the world (happening less and less thankfully) and probably some others like coaches cooking or Izuki-senpai's puns.

Neither of these things, however, could be compared to the blank, a bit hollow and confused stare of big, blue eyes.

"I'm sorry." Kuroko spoke in a soft voice. He sounded confused and lost as he scrunched his nose in that way Kagami usually loved, but now it was making his insides flop uncomfortably.

"Do I know you?"

So words could have the same effect as a basketball in the gut, who knew.

* * *

 

Kuroko fell off a chair in the library.

That was it. So damn stupid and so damn basic. Kagami was angry at Kuroko for using an old rusty stool to put the books back on their shelves.

He was angry at the first years who knocked the stool by accident because they didn't notice _someone_ was using it.

He was angry at Kuroko again for being a stubborn idiot and refusing his help.

And finally he was angry at himself for not insisting more on helping. That way maybe he'd be able to prevent this. Put the books by himself, warn the asshole freshmen or maybe even hold the damn chair.

 _Anything_.

Just anything to prevent that blank stare.

Kuroko's physical injuries weren't that bad. He'd got a bruise on his arm and a nasty bump at the back of his head, but that would heal with time. He didn't even have a concussion.

The only thing really suffering was his memory.

Because he managed to forget all of high school.

 _All_ of it.

He didn't remember the inter high, the winter cup, the team, the matches, his own techniques.

Hell, he didn't even remember _Nigou_.

And the puppy seemed to notice it, as he made sad dog noises and nudged at Kuroko's hands.

Kuroko of course would pet him and coo at what a cute dog it was, immediately followed by the question of who it belonged to.

And there was of course the issue of Kuroko forgetting _Kagami_.

He forgot all of it. Their whole bond, their whole friendship.

He forgot that they were together.

It was more than that though.

He would forget his techniques but not basketball _itself_.

He thought that maybe, gradually Kuroko would remember. Sometimes he would observe Kagami with a sort of fascination and looked at times like he wanted to say something, though he never did.

Maybe he found Kagami funny looking or something.

Kagami reasoned that maybe if Kuroko remember that they were friends he could make him ignite those feelings back again. Maybe. He wasn't sure, Maybe if you forgot such a big chunk of your life, your outlook and attitude changed. Maybe _some_ things were irretrievable.

It was more like...it vanished. Which seriously made Kagami feel like a ton of bricks hit him, when Kuroko smiled politely and asked _do I know you?_

That? Yeah, _that_ was, actually the worst.

* * *

 

The doctor said that Kuroko's memory should be 'triggered gently'. He said that talking to him, describing things in a casual way would be best. Taking him familiar places and letting him remember on his own, but not force it on him.

Kagami was in stitches.

Not only was it time consuming it was _painful_.

It was painful for everyone to interact with Kuroko. Tiring to remind him how he was with the team and what he said and what he did.

Thankfully, muscle memory helped.

Kuroko didn't forget basketball. It seemed that was ingrained in his very core and even if he lost all sense of identity, he'd never lose that. Which reassured Taiga in a way. Even if he had nothing, he at least had this.

Coach showed him old tapes with his new moves. After a stunned 'I can shoot?' that earned him a small laugh from the team and a bittersweet smile from Kagami, he went to train and after two weeks was all ready to start in a game.

Kagami never envied as much as he did then.

He wasn't muscle memory. No matter how many times they held hands, embraced and kissed Kuroko never made any move to show that he remembered something between them.

Sometimes when they walked home and parted at the intersection, Kuroko looked at him for a moment, kind of confused like he was trying to figure out something. In those moments Kagami hoped that maybe it was it, maybe it was _the_ moment and Kuroko would take his hand, rise on his toes, smile and call him _Taiga-kun_ just something, _anything_.

But he never did.

He just nodded to himself and said goodbye to Taiga and walked back home, to his family.

Which he didn't forgot.

* * *

 

Kagami doesn't know how to gently 'trigger' Kuroko's memory, so he just takes him places they used to frequent before the accident.

They walk back from school together and pass all the various places they used to hang out; the convenience store, the mall, some of the ice cream parlors. Kuroko's eyes still lack the glint of recognition.

They pass their favorite Maji Burger joint and Kagami's heart leaps into the air when Kuroko lets out a small 'ah' when he sees the logo.

"Do you remember this place?" Kagami asks, hands trembling slightly.

"Yes, of course." Kuroko says softly with a tiny smile and then crushes Kagami's hopes with the next sentence. "I used to come here with Aomine-kun after practice."

Kagami feels something cold and slimy touch his insides.

"Oh. I see."

Kuroko merely nods and they continue to walk in silence.

* * *

 

"This the court where we met and often come here to play after school." Kagami says, trying to sound nonchalant.

Kuroko hums in acknowledgement, as he enters the court and looks around.

It looks like any other street court in the vicinity, but for Kagami (and once for Kuroko as well) it holds a very special meaning.

It was the court where they met. It was the court where they decided to seriously play together. It was the court where they stopped on their way back home, whenever just to shoot some hoops, when something was bothering one or the other.

It was _the_ court where they had their first kiss too, but Kagami wasn't about to tell Kuroko _that_. It seemed that Kuroko had no feelings for Kagami. Without his memories even their friendship felt stunned and a kind of distant.

Kuroko looked around the court, scanning the goals, the benches and the fence and then he turned to Kagami with a surprisingly intent and serious look.

"Kagami-kun. Can I ask you something?"

"Anything." Kagami said and cringed at how his needy tone. He wanted to say 'sure' or 'go ahead' but he said that.

Kuroko didn't seem to notice, he kept staring at Kagami with his unnerving, steady gaze like he was searching for something in Kagami's face.

"Kagami-kun...are we...close?"

Kagami blinked a few times, not comprehending the question.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean. Are we close? Everyone at Seirin tells me I'm a valuable teammate and a friend to them, and while I can't remember it I can sort of feel it. I don't remember being in a library committee with Furihata-kun, but when he talks about it, I can believe him, I can feel it we've shared those moments. And everyone else tells me things as well. About the matches, about the practice, training camps and field trips and other things." He paused then and something in his eyes shifted.

"Everyone except you."

Kagami but his lip.

"Sorry. I didn't want to force you to remember things."

Kuroko shook his head.

"I'm not sure I will ever remember everything." He said and Kagami felt a lump of dread in his throat. "But I will try."

Pause.

"And I asked that because you have kept your distance, but for some reason I feel like you're forcing yourself."

Irrationally, Kagami felt like he was pray caught in a trap. Even if he wanted Kuroko to remember him, remember _them_ , he felt like he shouldn't influence it. He didn't want to make Kuroko feel like he was obliged to have feelings for Kagami. He didn't know him _now_. He didn't understand him as well as he did before he lost his memories. Kagami wasn't someone _this_ Kuroko had feelings for.

"Yes." He licked his dry lips and coughed awkwardly. "Yes we are. We...we're best friends actually." He risked.

Kuroko frowned.

"That's not what I asked. I-" He paused and tried to find the right words and then he reached his hand and touched Kagami's cheek.

"Are we close?" He repeated again. "Are we...in love?"

Kagami felt a mix of different emotions that he couldn't differentiate on the spot, but he could feel something like relief and hope among them.

He could only nod, as he felt his cheeks color under Kuroko's intense gaze.

And then Kuroko smiled.

"I thought so." He said and dropped his hand from Kagami's face and then, a true miracle happened, he laced their fingers together and Kagami felt like the awful, gaping hole in his stomach was starting to slowly close.

"Tell me about it." He pulled Kagami to a nearby bench.

He sat down next to him and for a moment just looked at their joined hands in awe.

He looked up and felt his mouth tug in a smile.

"What do you wanna know?" 

**Author's Note:**

> enjoy the angst


End file.
